Excerpt from The Christmas Baby Bundle (a novella)
“You’re right. We’ve had a heck of a time, Connor. I get that. I know this is the season of hope and all that good stuff. It’s just that…” Amanda swallowed hard. Connor hated it when she cried. Lord knows there’d been enough of that. “How many years did we try not to get pregnant? We never saw this coming.”
“No couple does.” His hands tightened into a knot between his knees.
“Don’t those early years seem so long ago, Connor?”
“They do. Five long years.”
Her heart pinched. “Wow, you say that like it’s a prison sentence or something.”
“Sorry. Nothing I say comes out right anymore.”
Or am I taking everything the wrong way?
She eased out a sigh. “Sorry, it’s just that we were so happy. Took so many precautions so we wouldn’t have a baby. We were careful.”
“Yeah, maybe too careful.” The glum note in his voice made her turn around.
“We agreed not to second-guess the decisions we made back then.”
“It’s just that sometimes I wonder if it’s my fault, even though my sperm count was okay.”
But “okay” wouldn’t do it. Not for a Kirkpatrick. “Connor, don’t. Does it bother you that you’re the oldest in your family but not leading the way with the baby making?”
He blew out a breath. “Don’t be ridiculous, Amanda. That’s not it at all.”
The two red circles burning high on his cheekbones made her wonder. Connor took his position as the oldest child in the Kirkpatrick family pretty seriously. He’d followed in his father’s footsteps at the firehouse. Had he expected to lead the way in other efforts as well? Sure, Seth and Joe hadn’t married yet, but Mark and Janie had two little boys. James and Randy were cute as the dickens. Malcolm had three children. The Kirkpatricks were all about family. She felt the lack of children every time she was around their nieces and nephews. How uncomfortable was that for Connor?
He heaved a gut-deep sigh, stood up and stretched. “Sorry, babe, but I have to get some shuteye.”
She got up to snap off the tree lights. “Wish you didn’t have to work so much.”
“The new shifts are still under review. Some of the guys like it because of the twenty-four hours on and time off. But lately, they’ve had to call us in anyway.”
Amanda climbed the stairs to their bedroom while Connor made the nightly rounds on the first floor. Didn’t take long to lock everything up tight. She could hear him slide the bolt in the front door. By the time he pushed back the covers and spooned behind her, she was half asleep.
“Love you, babe.”
“Back at you.”
Some nights they’d slept far apart, so disappointed about the family thing. She liked this a lot better.
They had to have hope. But for her that night, hope felt as far away as the stars.
Read more of The Christmas Baby Bundle at the following stores:
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Apple
Barnes & Noble
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“You’re right. We’ve had a heck of a time, Connor. I get that. I know this is the season of hope and all that good stuff. It’s just that…” Amanda swallowed hard. Connor hated it when she cried. Lord knows there’d been enough of that. “How many years did we try not to get pregnant? We never saw this coming.”
“No couple does.” His hands tightened into a knot between his knees.
“Don’t those early years seem so long ago, Connor?”
“They do. Five long years.”
Her heart pinched. “Wow, you say that like it’s a prison sentence or something.”
“Sorry. Nothing I say comes out right anymore.”
Or am I taking everything the wrong way?
She eased out a sigh. “Sorry, it’s just that we were so happy. Took so many precautions so we wouldn’t have a baby. We were careful.”
“Yeah, maybe too careful.” The glum note in his voice made her turn around.
“We agreed not to second-guess the decisions we made back then.”
“It’s just that sometimes I wonder if it’s my fault, even though my sperm count was okay.”
But “okay” wouldn’t do it. Not for a Kirkpatrick. “Connor, don’t. Does it bother you that you’re the oldest in your family but not leading the way with the baby making?”
He blew out a breath. “Don’t be ridiculous, Amanda. That’s not it at all.”
The two red circles burning high on his cheekbones made her wonder. Connor took his position as the oldest child in the Kirkpatrick family pretty seriously. He’d followed in his father’s footsteps at the firehouse. Had he expected to lead the way in other efforts as well? Sure, Seth and Joe hadn’t married yet, but Mark and Janie had two little boys. James and Randy were cute as the dickens. Malcolm had three children. The Kirkpatricks were all about family. She felt the lack of children every time she was around their nieces and nephews. How uncomfortable was that for Connor?
He heaved a gut-deep sigh, stood up and stretched. “Sorry, babe, but I have to get some shuteye.”
She got up to snap off the tree lights. “Wish you didn’t have to work so much.”
“The new shifts are still under review. Some of the guys like it because of the twenty-four hours on and time off. But lately, they’ve had to call us in anyway.”
Amanda climbed the stairs to their bedroom while Connor made the nightly rounds on the first floor. Didn’t take long to lock everything up tight. She could hear him slide the bolt in the front door. By the time he pushed back the covers and spooned behind her, she was half asleep.
“Love you, babe.”
“Back at you.”
Some nights they’d slept far apart, so disappointed about the family thing. She liked this a lot better.
They had to have hope. But for her that night, hope felt as far away as the stars.
Read more of The Christmas Baby Bundle at the following stores:
Amazon
Apple
Barnes & Noble
Kobo